Grief is uncomfortable. It should be looked at differently.
Take a deep breath, exhale, relax. Now, think of Grief as the opposite of Love. Love being strength. Strength to face doubt and discomfort and to move forward.
It’s okay to keep a bedroom or office as a memorial…IF there’s forward movement. If life is lived in the past, without acceptance, there is no forward movement, only discomfort. It’s an individual choice to remain sad or to move forward.
New memories are needed to move forward. To accomplish this, give it new challenges and new ‘data’ to replace what is missing. That’s forward movement.
When we’re comfortable with a friend or partner, and suddenly that person is gone, the brain is surprised and confused. To get over that confusion, give it something new to think about. Challenge it, comfort it. Avoid using a crutch like rumination. Rumination is repeated negative storytelling with one focus, ‘It’s not fair,’ ‘Why Me,’ ‘What am I going to do now?’ ‘It’s not my fault.’
Decide to change. The act of doing something, of being open to learning, promotes change. Climb a mountain, paint the house, revisit a hobby.
Earlier this month, my YouTube channel Let’s Talk Alzheimer’s with Elaine Scholly added a video on GRIEF, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VEq2VRL5kYM&t=17s
It offers a new perspective on how to manage Grief. Also, check the references for Dr. Mary Frances O’Conner’s book on The GRIEVING BRAIN. Stay positive, find comfort, and move forward.